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Article Without a Title

***
Before that,
Forgive me for my wrong wording.
I'm so sorry if there are any words or sentence structures that are not in accordance with the provisions of the English language.
I really need this language for my article now.
Thank you for your understanding.
~ Happy reading ~
***

I've dreamed of it ...

Standing beautiful by using the dress I've ever had blood red,
Using the mainstay of my high shoes black dark,
My black hair that fell long and very straight with a center parting,
Makeup on the face is equipped with a red lipstick that makes Me look more daring,
Fingers, ears, neck, wrists, ankles, they were filled with interesting jewelry and make Myself more sparkling in the dark of night,
A beautiful crown upon My head standing upright,
And I'm standing in this beautiful place, and saw You standing proudly in front of Me.
It makes no difference Your shapes with a prince.


I already have plans to launch it ...

Losing my mind, losing control, losing the tranquility and I fell.
I felt no power whatsoever, and I lost myself.
No .... !!!
I could fix everything in order back as the beginning.
I can't lose and fall, it is the power that I always force.
Don't let these tears beat me, I don't want to lose.
I need the power to make things better or make things back as the beginning.

And I started it ...

I make it as a gap,
I make it a plan to clean myself,
I make it a reason to forget everything that has passed,
I make it a new game to close my long game,
I make it as a joke until I finally destroyed by the joke.


I have undergone it ...

As if I don't ever remember how the foundation of this depth,
I enjoyed it and I welcome it,
I'm just learning and I finally understood that I enjoyed every test it,
I was mad, I was stupid, I can not calm down, I'm losing my mind, I knew there was something wrong in me,
What is wrong?
I stuck to my own game and I couldn't make it as a joke anymore.
Everything seemed to change, slowly and gently,
I was seduced and I do not know how to stop it.
I can't ...
How about this?
I couldn't stop and I really enjoyed it.
I tried to stop but I failed, I couldn't and I'm hurt.
What is going on?
Whether God was giving me a gift or was giving me a lesson?
Help me, I can feel the fear behind the current magnitude of the pleasure that I feel.


I have that sense ...

As if I've nailed everything in my life eternal.
Untouched and not end up in my arms, but I really feel that with the real.
Indifference turned into matter and begins with a growing sense of love.
Misses him, love him, love him, to have his selfishness, lust, the passion of love, jealousy, and desire.
It was crazy and unreasonable that they say about love, now I understand because I feel it.
I made all the wrong things to be right,
I ignored all the living beings that surround me,
I feel most correct and most appropriate for everything,
I feel they are stupid and don't understand anything about love,
I forget time and think time never runs,
I forget the pain even I feel sure it will not hurt anymore,
I say miss if there is no desire to exceed my this missing,
I say love like there's no love in excess of my love of this magnitude,
I say loyalty as if I never cheating on my past relationships,
I create my world, I created my dream, I create my story and I assume all will be real and happening.
My love above all things, and nothing can beat the magnitude of my love, at that time !!!


I'm aware and I hurt ...

Why are all too long?
Is too slow in coming a truth or I are always changing everything becomes truth.
I was too late ...
I prepared myself to fall in love but I don't prepare myself for falling because of love,
All the time I've felt that mistake, but I covered it and I turn it into right.
Now I'm crying,
I screamed in pain,
I blame myself,
I scream and squeeze my chest with a very strong,
I gave a blow on my body to revive,
I sing to entertain myself and then cry,
I laughed and then cried,
I gave up and didn't even have any strength to survive;
Finally I couldn't forgive my mistakes and ignorance.
No more, and I don't want to try it again.
All just a game and I'm just part of the game.
Nothing is real and it is still a part of the story of my own essay,
Nothing will happen because it is still a part of me for this delusion.

Flowers,
Chocolates,
Melody,
Lyrics,
Poetry,
Words of love,
Dolls,
Clothings,
Cakes,
Prayer,
Promise,
Marriage,
Ring,
Honeymoon,
Babies,
Family,
And others ...

I would assume that all is a symbol of falsehood.
I will not be deceived again by all of this.
I gave up and I don't know until when.
As if there are many more human beings out there who are trying to do the same thing to hurt me.
As if they all were competing destroy me and make my life miserable.
There should be no more that understands how weak and miserable I was.
They will continue to laugh at me and happy at the top of my misery.
Don't they understand what I am now?
I don't seem to have any power,
I feel like a failure and I seemed to want to stop playing with time,
Just for a moment and just a moment for me to rest.
Is this what they want?
I made the laughingstock of others,
I make the talk of others,
I made the mockery of others,
Makes me a disgrace in front of everyone.
They've succeeded and I lost.


I already know ...

It is a lesson again and again from the Lord.
What can I do?
I really want it for real, but it can not I get.
I can't continue to dream and fantasize, it's more painful to me.
I see my face in the mirror, really sad !!!
Real, I was really real with face and my life miserable.
I still want everything, obviously !!!
And for the last time, I have to be brave and stop all this dream.
Everything should be running normally and I can't play again in my sleep.
For once, I felt weak but I have the power to stop everything.
I will learn how to put myself in the perfect,
In the section that should have I learned the script.
I've run out of words ...
This sadness can not be explained with words,
I can't express it in song, the lyrics or whatever it is.
Look at me,
Then you will understand how that sadness,
Then you will understand how it feels sadness hurt me,
Look at me, just the way that you understand it.
And in the end,
I already know and understand the meaning of the word "TRUMA"
I have it.



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